To:
allrockettes@rockettes.com
From:shelby@rockettes.com
Subject: Rockette Gazette, 1/13/17
Hey ladies!
Welcome to this week’s “Rockette Gazette,” all the news that’s fit to email!
First off, as your Lead Dancer, I’d like to thank you for agreeing to perform at Trump’s inauguration. I know this decision was hard for many of us (I’m enjoying a little glass of wine as I write this to soften the blow, in fact), but as my grandmother used to say about experiences very much like this, “Just close your eyes and think of England, dear.” I’ve never been to England, so I just thought of Duran Duran, and that actually worked super well.
As you know, we’ve had some understandable trouble finding Rockettes of color willing to sign up for the inauguration gig. We TOTALLY get why, ladies, but now we have a pretty big “optics” problem. A long row of white women in precise lockstep saluting Mr. Trump is going to read a little “1936 Berlin,” I think. Jennifer P. suggested a bunch of us get spray tans to try to take the whiteness down a notch, but I don’t think performing in “orange face” will help with national healing. Other thoughts? Send them along!
As for the performance itself, I thought I’d include some reminders and tips so we don’t have any Rockette Regrets™ after the fact! (Sorry! I think that’s the Pinot Grigio talking!)
I know a lot of us have been crying through shows since we found out the news. Karyn has discovered Max Factor 2000-Calorie Extreme Lash Plumper Waterproof is an absolute must-have for sobbing through a performance. We’re buying these in bulk. (Great find, Kar!)
Many of you have expressed concerns about exposing your nethers during high kicks near Mr. Trump. I’m worried, too! That’s why we’re flying our legs at half-mast this show.